11 September 2008

Domestic Abuse

The effects of domestic abuse are often hard to understand if you have never come into contact with someone who has suffered its terrible effects.

I guess the truth is that most of us will have come in contact with many people who have suffered or are indeed suffering but because it is so hidden we are unlikely to know, meaning we are unable to offer support.

When we do know, we are often afraid to offer support for fear of having got it wrong and causing offence.

We don't want to be seen as interfering.

It is for that reason that the work of groups like Caithness and Sutherland Women’s Aid always impress me.

I recently visited their new office which has opened in Golspie to support their work across the area.

Women who work or volunteer with these organisations never fail but to leave me feeling in awe and humbled.

The problems caused by abuse tend to spread their tentacles much further than the abuse itself.

Women who experience domestic abuse often tend to lose their self esteem, meaning that their mental health suffers, often turning to drink or drugs to alleviate their pain.

This causes problems for those running refuges because these women not only need support to flee the abuse they also need help with other complex issues.

Because of these complexities refuge accommodation is not always appropriate making it even more difficult to provide support.

Often the forgotten victims are children – who live with and see the abuse on a daily basis.

Women’s Aid provides specialist workers to help and support children and young people.

These children are easily identified when their mother seeks help, but many women are too afraid to seek help and therefore children in need of help and support are often left without this.

Caithness and Sutherland Women’s Aid has now developed a service that reaches out to children and young people in their own right, even if their mother has not sought help.

This service is discrete – workers meeting children in the community, offering them advice, support and possibly most importantly understanding.

The isolation felt by children who live with the effects of domestic abuse is hard to imagine, their fear and helplessness in such situations is something that we cannot understand.

However that there are people available who do understand and will listen is a great step forward and will provide a lifeline to those children and young people.

It is the responsibility of us all to make sure that children and young people get the best start in life - they are the future.

By making sure they have the best start in life makes for a brighter future for all. Caithness and Sutherland Women's Aid is investing in that future for all of us.